Be patient with me...

Yeah, I felt the need to write a little more about the affects of my stroke...  It definitely has messed with the wrong chick.  I am not going to let it drive me into the ground.  

Yes, I had a stroke while in the hospital having a total hip replacement June 13th.  I was in a very good place to have it happen.  Definitely had immediate medical care.  They were amazing!

So this is what happened... and this is how I feel at times.  

"Homonymous hemianopsia, or homonymous hemianopia, is hemianopic visual field loss on the same side of both eyes. Homonymous hemianopsia occurs because the right half of the brain has visual pathways for the left hemifield of both eyes, and the left half of the brain has visual pathways for the right hemifield of both eyes. When one of these pathways is damaged, the corresponding visual field is lost."

My homonymous hemianopia is on the right.  

Mobility can be difficult. I have bruises because of it.

I often experience discomfort in crowds. I may be unaware of what or who is on my right.  I most likely won’t see you sitting or standing next to me… don’t get creeped out when I turn my head to look to my right. I have bumped into a wall, taken a corner to sharply and bumped into the railing.  I often have David walk on my right side and hold my hand so that that doesn’t happen.

I’m taking it in stride.  I am doing my very best to be me, the same me I have always been.  But I must admit, that there are days when I get frustrated, when I am tired, when all I want to do is sit back and do nothing.  So if you see me that way, it’s just one of those days, it is not the way I am always. Be patient with me, my brain is still healing, and I am still getting used to this “new way to see”.

All that being said, I am trusting God to take care of me, to guide me in these times.  He can use this time in my life, this disability or sorts, for good.  I am trusting Him to heal me, it may not be the healing of the physical aspect of the vision, but a healing that is beyond that. 

So, I am asking that you be patient with me.  If you think I am acting a bit odd or weird, or seem to have something on my mind…  maybe I do.  Or maybe I am tired. 

I am still recovering.  I am still me.  I am always going to be me.  So. Watch. Out.  Be patient with me.  

If you ask me to participate in something, take charge and I say no, it's because I need to.  Not because I want to.  I need time to heal, time to rest, I'm not physically able to do right now all the things I have done or love to do.  Remember?  I had a total hip replacement too.  You can't see anything that might hinder me to do things.  The limp is gone, and I have no outward appearances of not being able to do things.  So, be patient, don't try to convince me that it would be the best thing for me...  I will know when that is so.  

Be patient...