Friday, October 30, 2009

Heart Transplant

Last night in the "Outback" Bible study, there was an excerpt written by Barbara Johnson that read; "Belonging to Jesus Christ means that you've been given a heart transplant. With a new heart, He gives the power to be joyful, exuberant, and thankful. Eternal values replace temporary ones."
In today's devotional reading "Scripture compares our conversion experience to receiving a heart transplant" and references Ezekiel 36:26 which reads; "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh."
I have accepted this life-changing grace, that only comes from God. I thank Him daily for being patient with me, for never giving up on me. Without Him I am nothing. God freely offers His unconditional love, and I have been blessed beyond measure because of it.
My hope is that you will accept this miracle of grace, too.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009


I have not been on here in like, forever!!! And I'm not exactly sure why I am on here now. I think it has something to do with me being lonely. I have M&E here with me today, but it just isn't the same as having my family here. There has been a lot of stuff happen in the last month, good and not so good. Nothing that God can't handle for sure, but it seems that when things are going really good, a monkey wrench gets thrown in and messes up the gears of the forward motion. It either comes to a grinding halt or is going very slowly. I know that these are the times to lean on Him, and petition Him for His wisdom and help, and that is what I will be doing. Waiting on Him.

So, for now. Our plans for the weekend have changed big time. We were going to the Family Camping weekend in Mechanic Falls, ME with our CBC church family. Melissa was coming up to join us. We are not going to be able to go now, at least for the whole weekend. David's truck needs to be fixed this weekend, and will be quite a project....a good couple of days. We will need the money that we would have spent on the weekend to put towards the truck repairs. UGH!!!! I have talked with Melissa and she will still be coming up, but we will only be spending a day at McFalls.....probably Sunday so that we can be there for the baptism in the afternoon. A very huge part of family life. It isn't a total washout, but our plans are not always His plans.

I am working on my patience and perseverance....I am totally exhausted. Michelle and Joel have been going through a tough spell for a few weeks, and Melissa has left the nest for college, and all of that weighs heavy on a mothers heart. I praise God that He has them in the palm of His hand, and has plans for each of them, and that they all love Him, and serve Him. I am truly blessed.

So, I have rambled on long enough. I need to go and talk with my Father. He always makes me feel better.

Monday, May 18, 2009


Yesterday at the bridal shower for Shara we were all handed a small card to offer some "advise" to Shara for her new life to come. This word really got me thinking and wondering what "advise" I could give to someone. I could find all kinds of scripture verses or I could give some "deep" intuitive mumbo jumbo, but that is not really who I am. I don't like giving "advise", I think it is because I stumble with it. If I give "advise" and don't live it, then I feel like a hypocrite. If I can't live it myself, I don't think I should offer it to someone else, I mean I don't want them to see my failure(s). Well, I got over the mindboggling feeling of being inadequate to give "advise", and wrote something, not sure what it was exactly but the card ended up being really small, but it was from the heart. It was something I put into practice daily, not always an easy thing to do, but something that is God honoring when done.

So, the only "advise" I can give is think about what is pleasing to God, then do it.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009


It's one of those days! I know I am exhausted, so I'm sure that has something to do with all the emotional stuff, but WOW!!!! I am realizing that come the end of August we will have no "children" at home. Hmpf!!!!! that really stinks! The nest will be empty.

I am really proud of both of them, but they will be gone. They have grown up, and are moving on. Melissa will be home occasionally for weekends and maybe breaks, but there will be two vacant rooms for most of the time. Michelle and Joel aren't able to come back much as they are both working full time and it's hard to get time off other than holidays and special occasions. And I can tell you right now that there aren't enough of either of those as far as I'm concerned.

I knew this day was coming, but it has certainly been coming faster than I had thought it would or, for that matter, hoped it would. Oh well, life goes on.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Aaaaahhhhh......Spring, and New Life

I just love Spring. All the signs of new life. The new leaves coming out on the trees and new grass poking up through the turf, flowers budding and coming into full bloom. Absolutely beautiful! The fruit tree buds turning into blossoms and the smell of the new apple blossoms. Oh, spring is such a wonderful time of year.

It brings me back to May 12, 1987 when I experienced new life in Christ. What a great night that was! I went from being dormant for 32 years, to being made alive in Christ. For the past nearly 21 years I have experienced new growth, the pain of being "pruned" and "cut back", but most of all the love of the Creator to guide me through it all.

I am so grateful to God for loving me that much. That He had a plan for me and waited patiently for me. I can't imagine life without Him. Thank you, God!

Friday, April 10, 2009

Blessings overflowing

I am having one of those days when everything is a blessing. Even doing the taxes and raking the lawn. I much preferred the raking to the taxes. But the blessing in each of those is that I can do them. I have enough intelligence(please no laughing) to do the taxes and I am able physically to do the raking. I am also feeling very blessed to have my family. I am so in love with my best friend(yes, it is David), God gave me the best gift of all when He gave us each other. And then I have been blessed with two beautiful daughters after being told I would not have children(what did the doctors know--NOTHING). And I have a nephew who considers me his "Mom Dukes"(cute, huh?) and I have adopted him into my heart as my son. AND last August I became a mother-in-law to a wonderful young man who makes Michelle so very happy. And I'm not finished yet, because I have this VSN Tabitha who I would take for mine at anytime.

So that is the beginning of my blog, but in no way the end of it. I remember the song "Count Your Blessings", well, that is exactly what I am doing today. So, if I don't write anymore than this, you can be sure that I am counting my blessings all day long. My blessing list is very long.

Thank you Jesus for rescuing me and blessing me over and over again. I love you, Jesus!

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Ladies Day Apart

I am still sorting through it all in my head. What an awesome day! The worship time before each session was incredible! Carol Kent sharing from her heart was dynamic!

Session one was titled "living a new kind of normal". I always snicker when I hear the word normal. Most of you know why. In session one she spoke on 6 topics: The power of unthinkable circumstances, the power of relinquishment, the power of heartache, the power of community, the power of faith, the power of speaking up.

When she discussed the power of heartache, she emphasized that everyone has pain. No ones pain is any greater than anyone else's. "Pain is pain".

I really liked the word picture she gave for the power of community. Based on Luke 5:17-30. She said that our friends are our "stretcher bearers". What a great picture!

And she also said that our lives were "polka dotted" with trials in reference to James 1:2. And how true it is.

Session two was titled "developing spiritual authenticity". The topics she discussed in this session were: develop a passion for Jesus, do what the King wants done, cultivate honesty about sin, focus on thoughts beyond natural behavior, think in terms of eternity not time.

We are to be the real deal. Points to ponder; Do I try to give the impression that I am better than I am, or do I embellish or exagerate, does my conscience feel uneasy, do I do anything in private that would offend my friend. Wow!!!!

Session three titled "becoming a woman of influence". There were seven principles that she discussed, but the one question she asked impacted me for the rest of the session. "Who do you want me to influence?" Here are the principles: We need to spend time with God, we need to be walking and talking, we need to be willing to tell our story, we need to be willing to ask questions, we need to have compassion, we need to be able to cast vision, and we need to show unconditional love.

Writing it out like this certainly doesn't give the impact of being there. I am so blessed to have been able to attend.

I am going to add one more thing. The ladies at Calvary Bible Church in Derry went all out decorating for the event. The beautiful flowers on the stage, to the banners, to the bathrooms. That's right, they decorated the 6 bathrooms that were being used for the day. The 2 men's rooms were even transformed into ladies rooms. I went into 5 of the 6 bathrooms and found two of them to have polka dotted theme, one was decorated with Japanese Kimono's, and two were decorated with beautiful spring colors and flowers. I couldn't find the 6th bathroom. What a fantastic job they did to make us feel welcome and special.

Thursday, March 26, 2009


Yesterday was a good day! Really busy for me, and a really short day of work for David, but a really really good day. Some of you will understand and some of you won't. But let me tell you that the feeling of freedom is wonderful. It's been a long time(22 years) that we have felt oppression and enslavement, but now that has been lifted from us. We have persevered, and the reward is great. Thank you God for carrying us through this, and always providing us with all that we have needed. When things were tough, you provided, and you literally carried us through the murky waters. Thank you Lord!

Philippians 4:4, 13

Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Typical morning with David getting ready for work, Melissa getting ready for school and M&E coming to spend time with "Grauntie". But then the day turns into nothing but hubbub. I am roasting a turkey this morning(will be out at 12:45) so we will have something good to eat for dinner, the kids leave at 1pm or so, and then I have to rush out of the house and make it to Concord by 2:30pm to pick up a food delivery for the pantry. Then back to New Hampton to pick up a table at 3:30pm for M&J, then to the church to make sure everything is ready for Friends and to put away the food. Then home to finish our dinner. Thankfully everyone here loves hot turkey sandwiches, and I have homemade bread to make them with..... I will just need to cook the vegetables and make the pumpkin pie for dessert when I get home, but that will be enough as I won't be getting home until 5pm or so. Phew!!!! I'm tired already.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


Colossians 3:13, Ephesians 4:32, Matthew 6:14,15, Matthew 18:21-35

It is so hard to forgive, especially when someone continues to sin against you. Slandering and stealing. But God calls us to forgive them all the more.

Our "Outback" study this week has really made me stop in my tracks and take this to heart. If I can't forgive them, what does that say about my walk with God? And about God's forgiveness of me?

One of the questions was "Have you truly forgiven people who have harmed you?" My immediate response was - yes, of course I have. But then as I thought about it some more and prayed about it, I had to admit to myself and to God, that - no, I haven't. I had to confess to God that I have been harboring unforgiveness. God showed me that I had to forgive three people, and the difficult thing in all of this is they are relatives that I love dearly. But the release I have felt after praying and spending time with our great God has lifted that yoke of unforgiveness from around my neck, and I don't feel weighted down anymore. The problems are still there, but I can honestly say that I forgive them from my heart, for they do not know what they do. I can love them, but not like their actions towards me and my family. I will continually forgive them.

By not forgiving them, I did not have the forgiveness of God. Matthew 6:15. I thank my God for hearing my cry, for showing me my unforgiveness. Now I can walk upright and not be weighed down, I am forgiven. What a mighty God I serve!

Phillipians 4:4,8,13

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

I haven't fallen off the face of the earth.

Oh wow!!!!! It's been a long time since I've blogged. I was sick for two weeks and did practically nothing. It was so hard to sit up, that I literally had to force myself to get up and move, and not lay there like a beached wh.... never mind, I don't think I have made it that far......but oh did I feel like it.

But now, I am up and at 'em. Feeling great. So here is a blog. Hmmmmmmm.......what should I write about? I really can't think of much of anything to say.

So I guess what I will leave you with is this. I have not fallen off the face of the earth. I am still here. Being challenged with the daily schedules and work and everything that goes along with being a wife, mother, auntie, grauntie, aunt, friend and daughter. And I love my life, and all that goes along with it......being a wife, mother........well you know.

I trust you will enjoy this day the Lord has made. Rejoice and be glad in it. God has given us another day. Another beautiful day. To enjoy, to serve, to spend time with Him. And it can't get any better than this.......until we see Him face to face. What a glorious day that will be.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Wonderful Weekend

Our weekend away scheduled for February 28th - March 1st, was rescheduled to March 7-8 because of me getting Strep. It turned out to be a wonderful weekend away. I really needed the time away, and it was restful and the weather was absolutely great. A little rain on Saturday evening, but the days were sunny and warm. I needed the rest and to get away from the hubbub of life.

We arrived in Lenox about an hour ahead of schedule and went right to the apartment where Michelle was waiting for us. We enjoyed an hour visit with her, and then Joel came in from work so we had a chance to visit with him for a bit before they had to go for an appointment to check out an apartment. When it was time for them to go, we headed to the Days Inn where I had made reservations a few weeks ago, hoping that they had indeed changed the date of our arrival. We had a really nice room with 2 double beds as we had anticipated Melissa and Tabitha being with us the weekend before....but they both had plans so couldn't be with us for this weekend. We didn't remember how small a double bed was as we've had a queen size for about 4 years now. It was funny....... Anyways, we watched a bit of TV and David napped after the 4 hour drive, and then Michelle called and said they were on their way over to meet us.

They arrived and we made plans to go to dinner. Friendly's was the top choice until we remembered we had been given a 10% off discount coupon for Bennigan's when we checked in. So it was Bennigan's. We all ordered the same thing, well almost the same thing. We all ordered the Monte Cristo(Ham, turkey, 2 kinds of cheese, special sauce in a sandwich that was deep fried sprinkled with confectioner's sugar with raspberry preserve dipping sauce and french fries). Michelle ordered hers on panini bread with mashed potatoes. Delicious, but way to much food and way to much fried food.

Then after dinner we were talking about what we wanted to do, visit at their apartment or back to the Days Inn. Michelle really wanted to go off we went to their apartment to find out where the nearest candlepin lanes were....She found some in Lee....and off we went. The lanes were old, but definitely a family place, I loved it. We hadn't been bowling for soooo long. I was only able to do one string, but David, Michelle and Joel each bowled two strings. Dinner and bowling......what fun. Then back to the apartment for a visit, then we all remembered that we had to set the clocks ahead one hour. We were going to lose an hour of sleep so we decided that we had better get going. David was kind of snoozing off and on in the comfy chair anyways.

Sunday morning came to early, but we knew it would. I got up and started the coffee and got ready for worship while David slept in a while longer. Then off we went to the lobby for breakfast. I like finding a place that has free breakfast....even if it is cereal, blueberry muffins, english muffins and strudel's, coffee and juice. We fueled up and off we went for a ride. We were way to early for worship, but the ride was very nice and relaxing.

We found a pottery shop in Sheffield that was open so we stopped there for a bit. David does(well he has) pottery and is always interested in how others do their work, and to look at the pieces and see the varieties of things that can be done. I would have loved to have bought some of the pieces money for souvenirs. We will definitely be going back, so maybe next time. We drove out back to look around as they also dig their own clay on the premises.....very interesting. Time to head to Sheffield Chapel. Teen Challenge was leading the service........Michelle was running the sound board, Joel had the morning off from leading worship. They had a fellowship lunch for the church family and the men from Teen Challenge, it was definitely a feeling of family. We were greeted warmly and it felt good to know that the kids were in such a loving place. We heard nothing but good things about them and their involvement. For a mom it was so nice to hear that they are appreciated and loved.

Before we left for home we made one last stop at the apartment as M&J had something for Melissa. We gathered up the stuff and headed on home. Sad that the visit was over, but leaving knowing that they are happy, and they have a great circle of friends and a really special Christian family right where they are. We are blessed.

We arrived in Tilton, had to do our grocery shopping, and then started the rest of the way home exhausted. When we arrived home we found the house better than when we left. Melissa had been busy. What a nice and special thing to come home to. She even made chocolate mousse while we were gone and saved some for us. Delicious!!!! Thank you, Melissa!!!!! What a special treat.

When I told Melissa that Michelle and Joel had sent her some things, she checked it out and we didn't see her for over an hour. They had given her a dance revolution DVD and mat. She thought that was pretty cool. Thank you, M&J!!!

Well, that's our weekend. I had wonderful time away. We are looking forward to our next time to visit. Probably not for a month or so......probably more the so than the month. hehe

I am so blessed! I hope you all enjoy this day. Even though it is snowing. Rejoice and be glad in it.....enjoy all that God has created.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Long Week

It has been a very long week. Last Saturday I wasn't feeling extremely well, just thought I was tired and did everything I usually do on a Saturday. Lots of errands, and of course work. Sunday I ended up staying home from CBC because I was feeling really NOT WELL.....Monday I worked and did the food pantry, Tuesday decided that I was doing pretty well , then Wednesday came.....and WOW!!!!!! Not well. Worse as the day went on. I called for a doctor's appointment at 8:30am and couldn't get in until 10:55am Thursday. Thankfully Melissa was home and she watched M&E for me. I went straight to bed when they left at 11:45am and was still there when David got home. About 7pm I had decided that enough was enough and when David asked if I wanted to go to the ER I was ready to go. No second thoughts.....We got there at 7:45pm and were leaving at 9pm with two prescriptions......the pharmacies all closed at 9pm.....wouldn't you know. We got home and I went right to bed which for the last 3 nights has been my recliner in the living room. The pressure in my neck, throat and head was to much to lay down flat. David took Thursday off as a vacation day and stayed home and took care of me. He went and got my prescriptions as soon as the pharmacy opened in Meredith. I have never been so sick ..... UGH!!!!! I really wanted to spend the night at the hospital Wednesday, but I wasn't sick enough. RIGHT!!!!!! Friday morning I received a call from the ER Nurse and she told me my culture came back as Strep and to start my anitbiotic, I already had thankfully, so I had a day up on them. The other prescription was an anti inflamatory/pain med. I really thank them for that, as I couldn't even open my mouth without excruciating pain, my throat was so swollen shut that water or jello wouldn't even go through. David and Melissa have taken real good care of me. Both doing dishes and working at the church for me, and David has been great at making me things I could finally eat/drink. Chicken noodle soup for breakfast and supper, jello for lunch, tea w/ honey......that's what's been on the menu for me the last 4 days. I've lost 9 pounds.....not the way I wanted to, but it's 9 pounds less to start with when I get ready to take on that challenge. Today has been a better day, I had pizza for lunch.....not much because the spice was really bothering my throat, but it was real food.......oh yeah, I think I am making progress......I am going to try to accomplish the dishes today......maybe clean off the kitchen table as that's where everything gets put for mom to look at, and when mom doesn't look at it it just accumulates into this great big heap of stuff. And then probably another nap......I am hoping that my strength gets back soon, I need to get out of these four walls.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

The Real Me

I am loving this new Bible study that I have gotten into. "Being Yourself How do I take off this mask?" I didn't think I could be more myself than I already am, but have I learned a lot about what it means to really be myself.

The four sections are Just As You Are; The Power of Being Yourself; Knowing Yourself; The Fruit of Being Yourself. I have read through the whole book, now I am going through it and really taking in what it means. I am learning so much more about me.....and it's not all that scary. Really it isn't.

So, don't be surprised if you see the real me lurking around......I am going to be taking off the mask.....

I am enjoying this day the Lord has made and rejoicing in it. I am thankful that I can be me and know that God loves me for me and not what I do or look like.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

What a weekend! David came home sick Thursday night and stayed in bed practically the whole weekend. The only time he left the confines of the four walls was Friday night, when we both had a craving for SUBWAY.... So I drove us up and we ate our subs, and then home again. And sleeping is something that neither one of us have had much of, at least at night time. He was able to nap during the days thankfully, as his coughing all night kept him awake. And if he is awake, that means I am awake. So, since Thursday I have had little sleep and am working on solar energy, as long as the sun is out I can function somewhat normally, but as soon as it starts to go down, I function on moon light which is not quite enough. I am a bit blurry eyed and sluggish, but I must go on.
David did go back to work yesterday, and had a pretty good day.....a little slow and weak from not doing anything over the weekend. Last night however, not much sleep again......his coughing is so deep and harsh that it kept us both awake a good deal of the night. He has gone again today to work on what little sleep he managed to get.....I hope he doesn't overdo it......but he feels the need to go to work and do his part to provide for us. He is a good man, and cares so much for us, that he sometimes forgets to take care of himself. So I nag him.....did you take the DayQuil? do you need a cough drop? Maybe you should lay down and know that kind of nagging.
So, here I am this morning.......trying to keep my eyes open, and my mind filled with all things good. I just finished making breakfast for Maddison, she loves sausage......and Emmitt has been sleeping since he got here, so he will be up soon for his breakfast. I am making David a double batch of green split pea soup......YUMMY!!!!! We will enjoy that tonight for dinner.....maybe even some corn bread to go with it. We also have brownies for dessert.......I hope I don't fall asleep in my soup.......and a nap is not in the schedule for today. My mother needs me at 1pm today, so no nap this afternoon.
I hope you enjoy this day and rejoice in all that God has created and provided. I am thankful that I have Him to lean on in my weakness. He is all I need. He gives me the strength to make it through.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Something about Nothing

Wish I had something profound to blog about. I feel like blogging, but can't for the life of me put anything into words. My mind is a blank. I think it has something to do with to many movies of Curious George and the Veggie Tales. The vegetables are singing about not having a belly button.....YIKES!!!!!! I've gone into the childlike mode.......snap out of it have got to be a little more "adultlike" for Bible study tonight. And then again, maybe not. Yes, yes, yes......I do. So until I can think of something that will be profound, I guess I should leave this blog and try to stop talking like Bob and Larry.

Enjoy this day and rejoice in all its glory. Today I am thankful that I can still have fun with the silly stuff. That I haven't quite grown up yet.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Today is one of those days that I feel like doing nothing.....again! So Emmitt, Maddison and Grauntie are staying in PJ's today. Maddison didn't want to get dressed after breakfast, and neither did I. So we are just hanging out relaxing in the living rolling a ball across the floor to each other, reading books, watching all the kids shows, I think it's Dragon Tales right now. We especially like Clifford and Curious George and the big hit is Super Y. We sing and dance and have so much fun together. I would like it to last all day, but they will be going home about 1pm and then to work for a little bit and off to the doctor's and back to work for a bit more.

Yep, the doctor's. I am dreading it today. I don't usually mind, but it is a concultation today about my glyco levels. They are not good. The last three months they have been going up instead of staying down. I know he is going to tell me that I need to exercise more(how much more can I do? I don't actually exercise, but the vacuuming and mopping floors at church is a pretty good cardio exercise, believe me. And I have been having to do it every day, and it usually takes an hour or two depending how muddy the waters get.) and he will tell me to continue with the weight loss(he was pleased when I was in last week that I had actually lost 10 pounds, and today when I go in I think I have lost an additional 2).........and then there are the meds. Hopefully he will just up my prescription.

I hope you enjoy this day and that you will rejoice in all of it. The not so fun stuff and the fun stuff. I am just thankful that I am able to play and have fun and that I am able to get out to the doctor's and get medical attention even if it isn't fun.

Saturday, February 7, 2009


Now, what can I say about 3:00am? Well, I can tell you it is not a good time to get woke up. That's right, I was awaken at 3:00am by CATS....... and to make matters worse they were up to stay up, so that meant I was up to stay up. I ended up trying to catch a couple of Z's on the couch so that David could sleep. That didn't work well for me....

I have to tell you though, it was a beautiful morning at 3:00am. The moon so bright shining on the clean white snow. It illumined so brightly that I thought all the outside lights were on. But it was God's spotlight on the earth. Absolutely beautiful!

So, even though I was awakened by playful cats thinking they were kittens, knocking things over and climbing curtains, it was a good morning to look out on God's beauty. Maybe it was for me this morning. To observe all that God had created.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Last nights "Outback" group was sooo much fun. I don't think I have laughed so hard in a long time. It definitely wasn't all serious stuff we talked about. I think it all started with someone asking Melody where she was from, where she was born(because she has an accent?)......and then the stories started going around the room about our growing up with and without the modern conveniences of today. Let your mind wander as to what they could have been. As I looked around the room there were tears flowing from so much laughter. Throughout the whole evening there would be eruptions of laughter, at the most unexpected times about the most unexpected things. I don't know about anyone else there, but I needed that last night.

Some tough stuff to talk about was shared last night as well. We really do have Bible study. What a great group of ladies, so encouraging and understanding and supportive. I love this group of ladies.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

It's Just Me....or is it?

Well, I've been doing some thinking and pondering today. Is it Just Me? Have you ever walked into a room and had someone say, oh it's just you. How did that make you feel? The more I think about it the less I think much of it. Oh, it's just you...what does that mean? You are not happy to see me, or someone else is more important and you were hoping they would be the one walking in the room? As you can see this happened to me recently....I didn't feel real good about the greeting....could you guess?

Okay, so here is my take on it's Just Me. I use this phrase loosely, as it is Just Me. But, is it really Just Me. What does God think of who I am? I don't believe He thinks of me as Just Me. Doesn't it say in the Bible the he knows every hair on my head, that He knew me before I was yet born, that He created me? So, that being the truth, how can I be Just Me? God has also called me His child. He loves me. He has gone to prepare a place for me. I don't think I am Just Me to God, do you?

I believe that I am someone special, unique, an adopted daughter of God, beautiful in His eyes, the apple of His eye. Thankfully He doesn't look down on me if I fail, or say or do something I shouldn't. He still loves me, and never says....oh, it's just you.

So my blog is labeled Just Me, because it is me....that's me. Just Me......but I know it isn't Just Me. Make sense? :-)

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Subconjuctival Hemmorage. Sounds kind of freaky, huh?. Melissa looked at me this morning and said kind of weird....."Mom, looks like your eye is bleeding, have you looked in the mirror?" My immediate thought about looking in the mirror was.....of course not, I don't want to see me yet.....but I did go and look and oh yeah, it looked as if my eye was bleeding. So with my computer knowledge and webmd I think I have diagnosed the situation quite nicely. I am however not going to take my word on it and I am getting a second opinion this afternoon from an in person doctor. :)
I am enjoying the morning with Maddison and Emmitt...........Maddison and I have read a lot of books already and she has only been here for 2 hours.........breakfast is challenging as all she wants are Grunky's peanuts that she spotted on the table. We have watched Curious George for an hour, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Super Y and I'm not sure what the plan is now. Emmitt is just laying around sleeping and eating and cooing and smiling...........I have soooo much fun with the two of them. Maddison just informed me that Seasme Street is coming on........and the excitement about seeing Elmo, I guess it's time for me to go.
What a great day, enjoy it, rejoice in it and be thankful. I am thankful that I have this day to play, to enjoy the little things in life.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Today is the day. Devotions this morning Proverbs 15. I think I will read it again. Lots of stuff to learn. I am excited to have Bible study this morning with Belinda. We will be having it over facebook chat. We always have a crazy wonderful time when we study together. And our topic is quite appropriate for me as well......Porcupine People: How to Love the Unlovable. Intriguing, huh? It's been a good one for me.......issues keep coming up with my porcupine people. And guess what it means when I say it's Thursday.........uh huh......."Outback"...........oh yeah...........I just love that group of crazy ladies........we have so much fun........we learn so much about each other...........and we learn from the Word.................and we laugh............and we eat.............healthy stuff, not always...........and we share our hearts...........and our lives...............and our concerns............and we cry.............and we hug..............and we pray for each other.............and best of all we can be ourselves..............and we are not judged.............I am so looking forward to tonight.

Enjoy this day the Lord has made. Rejoice and be glad in it. Today I am thankful...........for my "Outback" sista's, all those crazy friends of mine........who hold me accountable and who love me for me. Probably the craziest of them all.........

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

"If we're going to be able to handle life when it doesn't seem to make sense, we have to get real. We have to set our faces in the right direction and keep walking as He walked. At times the road will be long and dark, the mountains unscalable. Because we're human we won't always make perfect choices. Sometimes it will seem we take two steps forward and one step back, but it doesn't really matter. All that really matters is being on the right road."

How many of us have heard the phrase, "oh, get real"..... I have heard it many times. But never in the context of what Sheila Walsh wrote in her book Life Is Tough But God Is Faithful. This book may have been written in 1999, but it is so applicable to my life right now. Life doesn't make many things have happened this past year that sometimes I am so overwhelmed with questions of why, that I forget to turn to the One who has all the answers. I may not get them right when I want them, but He knows every big and little thing that is going on. Why, and there it is again, do I wait until I can't seem to handle it anymore to go to Him, instead of going to Him right from the beginning. And I appreciate Sheila's sentence in the above paragraph that is the answer for me....."Because we're human we won't always make the perfect choices."

I've got to admit that things haven't been all roses and sunshine lately. Health issues of my mother, an uncle with recurring cancer and chemo treatments, an aunt just diagnosed with congestive heart failure, an uncle who committed suicide, family relationships strained, financial concerns because of hours cut, excruciating pain so that I don't want to move, to name a few. But I can have peace because I have Jesus. Praise God!!!! I have to admit that I struggle, that I question, that I let Satan get a foot hold at times, and listen to his voice that I am not good enough, or that I've done something wrong and that the reason I have pain is because of some hidden sin that I haven't confessed(and people have said that directly)... I will not let Satan get a grip on me, I am an adopted daughter of Christ. I will make mistakes, but by the grace and mercy of God I am forgiven.

I am going to set my face on Christ and do my best to walk as He walked and stay on the right road.

Enjoy this day the Lord has made. Rejoice and be glad in it. Today I am thankful............even though it is cold outside, it is warm inside, and not just in the house, but my heart is warmed with the love of Christ.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I had something so profound to blog this morning, or so I thought.....everything that I have been thinking about is somehow being erased from my mind. I have been reading again this morning and realizing a lot about myself from this book. That I don't have to do good things to please God, to make Him love me more, that all I have to do is be His seek Him and spend time with Him. My life is filled with doing good things..........not that that is wrong, but do I really take the time with God that He deserves? Do I spend quiet one on one time with Him? I have to admit that my answer is, NO!!!!! I have been struggling with this issue for a loooooong time. Thinking that I am doing what would please Him by doing good things.....when all along what He wants most is for me to spend time with Him. The Mary and Martha thing......Mary chose what was right....Martha, well, Martha was doing what she felt was right. And Jesus response to her grumbling? Martha, Martha......... Oh, I don't want to hear those Sharon, Sharon words.......

Enjoy this day the Lord has made. Rejoice and be glad in it. Today I am thankful.......... that God loves me for me, and not what I do for Him.

Monday, January 12, 2009

I've just started reading the book Life Is Tough But God Is Faithful by Sheila Walsh. I was wondering when I started if it would be a book I could stay interested in.......I don't like to read just to read........but this is a good read. It has in the first couple of chapters really made me stop and think about the things I have had to deal with, the struggles of life........and that sometimes I question God as to why.......Why can't I just remember that whatever I go through in life that God is in control and can use all of it, good and bad, to make me stronger. Duh!!!!!
My devotions this morning certainly made me do a double take in my reading. How many of us love discipline? I know I haven't loved it, but now I have to think of it in a different light. Proverbs 12:1 To learn, you must love discipline; it is stupid to hate correction.

"In one sense, this proverb describes two different types of people; those who learn, and those who refuse to learn. The first, the learners, understand and accept the necessity of discipline as part of the learning process. The second, the refusers, ignore and reject correction. The learners decide to love discipline; the refusers decide to hate anything and everything that might offer a good lesson. The learners grow in wisdom; the refusers sink into stupidity."

Wow! Never thought of it that way. Why not? I guess I have thought of discipline as something negative, when in reality it is something to create a positive. to teach, for me to learn right from wrong........who would have thought I could not have understood.........

I want to learn. I will now think of discipline as a learning curve. What is there for me to learn from this?

Dear Lord, please remind me today that when I make my next mistake I have also created a good opportunity to learn. Help me love that!

Enjoy this day the Lord has made. Rejoice and be glad in it. Today I am thankful.......that even at my age I can still learn what God wants for me.