It's the little things....

Oh my goodness!  This has been a very difficult couple of months.  The shortness of breath, pounding heart, "catch breath" stuff...  I've had, xrays, blood work, ultra-sounds, stress echo, CT scan, more blood work, several doctors visits...  and still can't explain what the underlying problem is...

I have been literally unable to do anything...  the stuff I love to do here at home...  cooking, washing dishes, laundry...  it was a real struggle, and still is quite honestly...  but I am pressing on, and doing the best I can...  thankful that I have a very supportive husband that pitches in and helps, and doesn't mind things getting done slower if they get done at all.

There have been days that I would sit down and cry because I just couldn't walk across the floor without being out of breath...  Scary...  extremely scary.

This morning I am grateful for the little things I can do now...  they may not seem like much, but to me they are HUGE!!!  I can do the dishes without having to sit after only a few minutes, I can fold an entire load of laundry without taking a break, I actually walked up a flight of stairs at church having to sit at the top for a minute or two, but I haven't been able to do that for nearly two months.  I could play corn hole without to much effort on the breathing with Michelle yesterday...

Today I go to see the doctor to get results of a CT scan and some blood work that I had done this week, and to see what more I need to do...  so you could pray that there might be some answers...  but if not, I am praising God that He is giving me the strength to get through each day, every minute of each day...  praising Him that I am able to greet the morning, and live each day to the fullest.

What does He have planned for me today?  I don't know.  But I am ready...  because with His strength I can do it...

Seems like it is just a waiting game....

Or maybe it's who's going to back down first.  If we make her wait long enough, maybe she'll just give up...  that's how I've been feeling through this "experience".  Well, it isn't going to be me giving in...

The stress echo test took three days to get approved by the insurance company...  good thing I wasn't having a heart attack...  it did show my heart was healthy, however it is pumping to hard on minimal activity.  Am I getting enough oxygen?  So a CAT scan of my chest needs to be done to find out if the lungs are clear of clots or an infection that the previous xrays wouldn't show.  Friday the insurance company was alerted, they finally gave approval yesterday afternoon.  So I have that scheduled but not until August 10th.  At least it is scheduled.

I know that we will get to the bottom of this, and that God has it all under control, but I am just tired of feeling this way.  So very tired of feeling this way.

So, I've been praying for answers and healing...  would you pray with me?